


Fix you

by allimoon



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Coldplay, Gen, Light Angst, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-09
Updated: 2015-06-09
Packaged: 2018-04-03 16:20:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4107289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allimoon/pseuds/allimoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hinata doesn't undestand what's going on with Kageyama and he just desperately wants to fix their current situation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fix you

**Author's Note:**

> My first attempt to write an angsty fic. I chose the song Fix you by Coldplay because I was just listening to that and the lyrics were quite fitting to the plot - or the plot was quite fitting to the lyrics. Yeah.

—When you try your best but you don’t succeed—

Hinata Shoyou’s absolute favorite daytime activity was playing volleyball, of course. He loved the feeling when his heart was beating rapidly and every cell of his body demanded to run faster and to jump higher, while his mind was completely calm, his eyes focused on his teammates, on the enemy’s block and on the ball.

And focusing on his setter, especially when they were practicing their quick-strike.

"Oi, dumbass, that was even worse than the one before!"

His setter wasn’t just grumpy, Hinata thought. He didn’t like it how easily Kageyama would scold him off for not running fast enough or even not jumping high enough, because he did everything he could, he tried and tried over and over again until he almost couldn’t breathe, but now he started to feel like he would never be good enough.

Not good enough for him.

"One more!" the redhead shouted. He won’t give up. He can’t give up.

 

—When you get what you want but not what you need—

On the next day the sun was shining while Hinata was in his classroom. It was Valentine’s Day and his classmates were chatting about who got any gift or confession. The redhead always loved this day; watching someone getting a rose, watching someone giving a rose – he loved how everyone just seemed to be happy.

He thought maybe Kageyama wouldn’t be so grumpy on a cheerful day like this, and he tried to imagine the taller boy with a shiny aura and maybe even with a smile, then he immediately started laughing.

"E-er, I-I’m sorry…"

Hinata looked up. He was sitting on his chair in their classroom, and apparently it was already lunch break. Kageyama might get to the roof faster than him, and he absolutely wouldn’t let that happen.

But when he looked up he saw one of his classmates standing right in front of him. She was blusing a little, he noticed, and she seemed to be nervous.

"Yes?" Hinata didn’t know what to say. He wanted to encourage her to speak faster, because he had to leave or else he will lose to Kageyama.

"I-I’m just… I really like how you play… volleyball…"

Her voice was almost inaudible and she was looking at the floor. It took Hinata a couple of seconds until his mind processed what was going on.

It was Valentine’s Day.

Then he saw something in the girl’s hands. She was holding something that looked like… chocolate?

"I-I… I know you will have a match today, and I just… I just wanted to tell you… good luck." she whispered.

Hinata felt like someone switched his mind off. He had no idea what to say. It wasn’t a confession after all, right?

"A-and…" she continued, "I think you are amazing."

The redhead’s eyes were wide open. What is going on? She called him amazing? Him?

"I just wanted to give this to you." she quickly put the chocolate on the table. "I’m sorry I have to go."

While Hinata watched her leaving he spotted a tall figure in the corridor, but in the next moment it disappeared.

The redhead could have sworn he saw a pair of blue eyes.

 

—When you feel so tired but you can’t sleep—

Hinata was lying on his bed while enjoying the cold wind coming from his open windows. He wanted to join the wind, to leave this house, this town and everything behind.

Especially him.

They had a practice match that afternoon, and their opponents were really strong and highly skilled. Hinata did everything he could; he was running like a maniac, even though his legs were so damn tired, and he was jumping and jumping, spiking the ball which came his way less and less. In the end he was just spiking the air for a couple of minutes, but he didn’t want to confront Kageyama, because the taller boy was acting weird all day, and not in the way the redhead could deal with.

Hinata was almost sure Kageyama looked like he was sad somehow, but he had no idea how he could soothe him or even cheer him up, nor did he have any idea about what made him feel like that. His personality was still a huge question mark for him.  
So he decided to give him some more time.

 

—Stuck in reverse—

But during the enemy’s match point Hinata finally outrun the block, smiling happily and his hand spiking the ball – which never came.

Kageyama didn’t toss to him.

The opponents’ block couldn’t reach Hinata, but somehow they reached Tanaka, and Nishinoya wasn’t ready to receive the ball from that direction, because he was sure Hinata would spike it.

Hinata couldn’t look up. He didn’t want to meet with those eyes. He could hardly keep his tears inside, but somehow he managed to.

 

—When the tears come streaming down your face—

"Why didn’t you toss to me?" He whispered into his pillow, and the tears that he managed to hide during the day finally came.

 

—When you lose something you can’t replace—

He felt so tired and empty on the inside when he woke up that he almost didn’t go to school. But he had to talk to him, he couldn’t bear the cold stares and the cold words any longer from him.

He needed Kageyama. He needed his friend.

Before morning practice he had to wait for the setter because he was late. He had never been late before.

"Kageyama."

The taller boy looked at him, and Hinata couldn’t figure out the meaning of his glance. Annoyed? Sad? Filled with hatred?

The spiker felt like he was staring at the bottom of the sea; it was unknown and absolutely cold.

"About yesterday…" the redhead started but Kageyama quickly interrupted him.

"Don’t."

"But I want to know."

The setter sighed.

"Know what?"

"Why didn’t you toss to me?"

"I can’t always toss to you."

"But there was no wall in front of me!"

"Their libero was right there to receive the ball you were about to spike."

Hinata was speechless.

"You want to ask me why did I toss to Tanaka? Because he had bigger chances to score than you at that moment." Kageyama said.

"You couldn’t know that."

Kageyama crossed his arms over his chest and remained silent.

They were staring at each other for a few seconds, then Hinata gave up. He turned around and wiped the tears off from his face, which Kageyama couldn’t see.

"Let’s just go to practice then."

 

—When you love someone but it goes to waste—

Hinata didn’t want to go to school, and especially to practice. This had never happen before. However, his mom didn’t let him stay at home, because he was obviousely not sick.

Practice was almost as unbearable as Hinata imagined it would be. Coach Ukai made him and Kageyama do some quicks separately from the rest of the team, but the spiker didn’t manage to properly hit any of the tosses.

He was waiting for Kageyama to scold him off, but that didn’t happen. Hinata was sweating and breathing hard, but he somehow liked this kind of pain. At least it almost made him forget about his own thoughts.

After practice he run up to the taller boy, who was already leaving, not even waiting for Hinata.

"Hey, Kageyama! Can we talk?"

The setter didn’t stop walking and didn’t look at him, only nodded a little.

"You know, I really don’t like this. If there’s something, anything I can do to change this, I would."

Kageyama finally looked at him.

"You would?"

"Yes! Just please, don’t treat me like that."

He raised his eyebrow a little.

"Like what?"

Hinata looked away, not daring to meet the other boy’s glance. His voice was almost inaudible.

"Like… like I don’t matter to you."

Kageyama sighed.

"Let’s talk about this later."

 

—Could it be worse?—

"Please call me back" Hinata texted him.

And he waited.

 

—Lights will guide you home—

Hinata couldn’t sleep. He was thinking about what he should have said to Kageyama instead of his small words. He could have told him about how he felt completely hopeless, how he didn’t want to go to practice to play volleyball, which he loved the most, because of him.

He decided to take a walk outside to soothe his mind, so he grabbed his phone and silently sneaked out of the house.

It was already 10PM and he felt like the cold air was clearing his thoughts. The stars were shining beautifully and the streetlights kept him out of the darkness, leading him on his way. He didn’t want to run away anymore or to silently cry into his pillows. He felt strong again, and he was sure he could manage to fix his situation with Kageyama somehow. He won’t be sad about that ever again.

After walking down a few miles he turned back to walk home, smiling into the night, when his phone suddenly started buzzing.

 

—And ignite your bones—

After he realized who was calling him he immediately stopped walking.

"Kageyama?" He felt his voice weak again, and he hated himself for that.

"Are you awake?" The setter’s voice was as calm and steady as always.

"Yeah."

"There’s something I would like to talk to you about, so can you come a little earlier to practice tomorrow?"

Hinata was hoping Kageyama wanted to talk about the same thing he wanted to discuss too.

"Okay."

"And… and I’m sorry."

Hinata was silent.

"I’m sorry that… I made you feel that way. That you don’t matter to me. Because…"

Hinata was holding on to his phone with maybe too much force, but he could hardly hear the other boy’s words.

"Because you do."

 

—I will try to fix you—

Before the phone call ended he could have heard Kageyama’s soft voice.

"See you tomorrow, Hinata."

**Author's Note:**

> I'M SORRY


End file.
